i would like to preface this short message by saying that i am a lesbian, and have been going to pride parades and being active in my local queer community for over a decade. basically, don’t call me lesbophobic or terminally online because i disagree with a specific label that paints a misleading picture of my lived identity. i am also neutral on mspec gays because “gay” is also used as an umbrella term (and i am not mlm, so it’s not really my place to speak on it). “lesbian”, however, is not an umbrella term anymore.

i dislike the labels “bi lesbian”, “pan lesbian”, or any other mspec identity + “lesbian” combination because they are lesbophobic (and apparently biphobic, but as i’m not bisexual, i won’t be speaking on this). the label “bi lesbian” implies attraction to men while also being a lesbian, which is contradictory and suggests that lesbians can be attracted to men. lesbian means non-men loving non-men. some people also often cite the historical use of “lesbian” to mean all sapphic women; however, we have had labels such as bisexual and pansexual to describe other types of sapphic attraction for decades now. the definition of lesbian has changed over the years from being an umbrella term to being an exclusive term for nmlnm (non-men loving non-men).

in short, i, as a lesbian, dislike mspec lesbian labels. however, if you are a lesbian and disagree, that’s completely fine and valid! my opinion on certain labels would never stop me from being friends with people in real life. i only ask that mspec-lesbian label users please dni, because the label makes me, a lesbian, uncomfortable.